Visitation
The visitation/wake/gathering/vigil; provides a chance to talk. Visitation times at the funeral home or church or friends dropping by the home give us the chance to begin telling the stories about our loved one. We establish significance as we talk about the person. The stories we tell will one day become the great memories that stay in our hearts forever.
The visitation can be restricted to just close friends and family, or be open to the public. You can even have a combination of private and public hours.
Is there a special ceremony?
As part of the visitation, you can arrange a formal ceremony, an informal ceremony, or none at all. The formal ceremony might be a brief service with the saying of the rosary (for Catholics) or services conducted by fraternal or military organizations.
In some families, there is much drinking and feasting and storytelling during the visitation.
For those who are comfortable with it, an informal storytelling session can be a wonderful way to remember the person.
The stories don't all have to be solemn, nor do they all have to show the person as a saint. We often love people as much for their flaws as for their strengths.
Remember, too, that laughter is as much a sign of strong emotion as tears or anger.
And if the person had a good sense of humor, there are bound to be some funny stories.
This sharing can be a rich and powerful experience.